Sunday, November 20, 2011

The Kid

Given that I'm still in a sort of introductory phase with this blog I thought I'd take a few moments to tell you about my kid. Let's call him Balthazar. Why? Well, he chose Balthazar for his Confirmation name ("Because it's *sick*, Mom!") and he used it only the one day, so it's still got that new-car-smell, as it were.

Plus, there are a number of interesting connotations to the name, both good and bad. Traditionally (though not Biblically), one of the three wise men/kings who trekked way out west to give props to the Baby Jesus was a Balthazar (which rendered the name acceptable for The Kid's Confirmation). On the dark side (my favorite side, of course), the name Balthazar has been applied to several miscreants, among them an angel with conflicted loyalties in the TV series Supernatural, and a half-demon seeking to overthrow Satan for a bigger share in bad-guy glory in the film Constantine.

So that's The Kid in a nutshell, really: he's a wiseguy and an unholy terror. OK, that last bit may be a slight exaggeration, but here's an example of the smart-assery he throws my way on a daily basis:

One year, when The Kid played football, he posted as his Facebook status some encouragement to his JV team, as they had a game the next day. That night, he pored over photocopies of plays he was supposed to memorize and finally threw them on the coffee table in frustration.

Me: What's the matter?

The Kid: I'll NEVER memorize all of these.

Me: Well, you won't if you don't go over them. (I watched him not go over his plays for a couple of minutes.) Hey, explain that play to me.

The Kid (rolling his eyes): You'll never understand it, Mom.

Me (gritting my teeth and reminding myself that love is patient and kind and, almost certainly, not murderous): Try me. (I pretended to pay attention as he pointed at Xs and Os and lines and so forth. I interrupted him as he pointed to a prominently featured "O.") What's that, there?

The Kid (in that teenage sage-smug tone): That's the quarterback, Mom.

Me: What's his name?

The Kid (dopey grin lighting his face): "Circle."

True story, folks.

There are other truths I can share about The Kid: he pursues his goals full-throttle, regardless of any obstacles he may encounter along the way. He's smart, creative, witty, fearless, compassionate, discerning, principled, and charismatic. He's a story-teller, a comedian, a guitarist, a lover of art, heavy-metal, and teh kittehs. He's my pride and joy, my inspiration (and exasperation!), my hero and my hope.

And forever, he's my baby.


  1. Your smartass should meet my little DW Bossy Boots ;) Now THAT would be fun to watch ;)

    Well done, my dear :)

  2. Facebook has me so well trained I keep wanting to "Like" it when someone comments on my Bloggy-blog! :-D

  3. Thanks, Jo! I find when I'm done gnashing my teeth, I can smile as well. ;-)

  4. "The Kid" sounds pretty awesome :) I always wonder how much credit we, as parents, get to take for that. I'm inclined to claim at least a little bit and I hope you do too :)

    ~ Rhonda Parrish

    1. Thanks, Rhonda. I have no problem taking full credit for all of his good qualities. ;-)


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