Monday, July 21, 2014

Is The Kid Losing His Edge???

Balthazar & Goth Mom Lite
on Balthy's 19th birthday
May 29, 2014
If you're a regular reader, you'll know how my Kid, Balthazar, and I tend to go out of our way to push one another's buttons. And by that I mean that he goes out of his way to be a smartass and I struggle just to keep up. From being asked how I'd feel about him joining the Church of Satan to being advised that the men who've shown the slightest bit of interest in me must be psychopaths, Balthazar delights in nonplussing me. (What? That's totally a word.) Sure, I've managed to score the occasional hit, but it's generally the Kid who's in the lead in this ongoing game.

Except...I think he's mellowing, a bit. Possibly, he's losing his edge. Rather than seek to blindside me, he's been more...goofy.

A few days ago, I posted on The Facebook the following:

NYC's experiencing mighty stormy weather at the moment. Here's the text exchange between me and My Kid about him getting picked up by his friend to go to band practice:

Me: Ok. Text when u get to [friend's name redacted]'s

Kid: Why???

Me: Cause it looks like Armageddon out there.

Me: Isn't it dark, cloudy, rainy in [hometown's name redacted]?

Kid: Idk what youre talking about the sun is out the birds are singing a unicorn just flew by and Osama Bin Laden is dead like the forecast could not be more positive

Me: ...

Kid: Naw but yeah its p shitty

See what I mean? Goofy! But not obnoxiously so!

I wonder...

...should I worry? Is he simply dialing back in his advancing years? Or is this a fake out, and he's lulling me into a false sense of security, planning to zap me a good one when I least expect it?


Monday, July 14, 2014

Snarks ~ Getting Laid

I apologize in advance to all my fellow perverts who thought this post would be about sex. It is not. It is a Grammar Nazi Rant because I absolutely must. I roll my eyes, so fucking hard, every time I hear this travesty of language that I fear those orbs will pop out of their sockets. Thus, I must raise the lid off my steaming pot. (That is not a euphemism for sex.) (OK, it could be, but it's not this time. Focus, people!)

The word "lay," as defined by Wiktionary and every sane and rational individual ever, means:
 "To place down in a position of rest, or in a horizontal position."
The site further provides the following example of the proper usage of this transitive verb:
" lay a body in the grave..."
Which is exactly what I want to do when I hear folks say shit like, "I'm going to lay down." Is that so? Oh, you mean you're going to lie down? Well, then, fucking say that. Because Wiktionary confirms that the word "lie" means:
"To rest in a horizontal position on a surface."
My guess is some people remember that kiddie prayer from way-back-when which starts,
"Now I lay me down to sleep..."
But check it: in that sentence, I lay me down. I place myself down in a position of rest, or in a horizontal position. Thus, that usage works. The other crap doesn't.

Even the expression "getting laid" works, if you're using it to describe the act of some other lucky person placing you in a horizontal position for purposes of sexual intercourse. Presumably, if one readily, frequently, and indiscriminately permits oneself to be placed in a horizontal position for purposes of sexual intercourse, one might be considered an "easy lay" (but not by me, 'cause I don't judge). (Much.) (Nah, J/K. To each, her/his own.) (Except when it comes to grammar, in which case you'd better toe the goddamn line.)

So no, you weren't laying down on the couch, you were lying down. But you did lay your fork down on the table when you were done eating that lasagne. (You know, assuming you were using a fork.) (And if you weren't—ick.)

For a more comprehensive, and far less rabid, take on the matter, click here. Or just take my word for it. Whatever you do, do not get these wrong if you've a pedant like me in your vicinity, as the poor unfortunate may lose control and...I shudder to think what might happen.


Monday, July 7, 2014

Re-Tweeting the Love...

It's a fantastic feeling when folks either:

a. find your Tweets so fabulous or

b. find YOU so fabulous

that they want to share your stuff with their own Twitter followers by re-tweeting it. So, because your pal(s) did you this kindness, you might Tweet back a quick, "Thanks for the RT!"—a polite and lovely way to acknowledge someone's support.

After doing this myself for a good while, I saw another way I could show my thanks. First, as soon as I can, I "Favorite" that person's re-tweet, to show that I saw it and am grateful. Next, I find something of my follower's to re-tweet (which takes about the same amount of time as it takes to type out a thank-you message). This is especially helpful to fellow authors, whether Indie or traditionally published, or creators of ANY stripe, as you're spreading the word about their stuff, which is exactly what they need.

This works for Facebook too: go ahead and "Like" that post of yours that your peep has "Shared" and then share something of your peep's! In fact, this is probably doable on any social media platform.

What if you can't find something of your friend's to re-tweet or share? You can quickly create something by Tweeting about your friend's Web site, or Sharing a memory of some kooky shenanigans y'all got up to, way back when.

For me, the bottom line is that I want my followers/friends to know that I saw what they did for me and want to return the favor by promoting them as well. I mean, yeah, it's generally more work than I like to do, lazy gal that I am, but it feels good (when I remember to do it!). ;-)

Monday, June 30, 2014

It's Wabbit Season!

20011122 12sant Latvia Postage Stamp
Image credit: Philaweb
So I was groovin' to some '80s alternative rock on Sirius XM's 1st Wave. The program's host, Richard Blade (a legendary DJ and entertainer from the UK who's super cool and a joy to listen to) was in between tunes and reminded folks that day one of a new month drew nigh. To insure good luck for that month, he advised us to say, "White rabbits, white rabbits, white rabbits," upon waking on the 1st. I was all, "Say what? Is that a thing?"

The origin of this British superstition seems to be lost in the mists of time. However, around the turn of the 20th century it was documented as totally being a thing to chant some variation of these words on the first day of a month for luck. If one finds the idea of repeating "white rabbits" three times cumbersome, alternatives include:
  1. Rabbit!
  2. Rabbit, rabbit!
  3. Rabbit, rabbit, rabbit!*
  4. White rabbits!
  5. Rabbit, rabbit, white rabbit!
  6. Bunny bunny foot foot!
*Apparently, #3 has been associated with receiving a present by the end of the month, as well.

It's not altogether clear why any of the above should be considered lucky (though a rabbit's foot has been believed to harbor talismanic properties for, like, forever). Of course, rabbits are known to "get lucky" pretty regularly (nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more) so maybe that's got something to do with it. Whatever the reason, the ritual seems a small price to pay for 30/31 days of goodness, eh? I plan to give it a shot (and I say "plan" 'cause I can't be sure I'll remember to) this coming July 1.

Think you'll give it a go? Or is there some other thing you do at the start of the month to bring on the good juju?

Yankee Magazine

Monday, June 23, 2014

Words, wOrds, WoRDS

Is y'all ready for my trademarked game of Words, wOrds, WoRDS?

(OK, yeah; it's not actually trademarked and, in fact, I'm playing whether you're ready or not. I just asked 'cause that, and exhorting people to wave their hands in the air like they just don't care, is how you get folks all pumped up for stuff.)

Using the Random Word Generator at, I'm going to toss out a word and you're going to share the first thing that comes to your mind, in the comments section below.

Can ya dig it?

Today's random word is...


To learn what came to my mind, select the darkened text between the asterisks.


After a few seconds of blinking rapidly at the blank my mind drew, it occurred to me that a task force should be assembled to apprehend my latest celebrity crush, Richard Armitage, who's making the character of John Proctor in The Crucible a bazillion times hotter than he's got any right to be. Le W00F!!!


Go on, then. Reveal unto the world what that word inspired in your little gray cells.

If you dare...

(And you can click here to check out that thing I mentioned in the dark space, above.)

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