Monday, March 17, 2014

Color Me Blue...

Color Me Blue
Blue-WikiPill
by Mina Lobo

I feast but never fill up,
I bleed myself for love,
I tire of fruitless praying
for blessings from above.

So I don’t want to party,
and I don’t want to fight.
I don’t want to sing and
I don’t want to write.

No…

I just want my slumber
to buoy me away
along its twilight waters,
far from the break of day.

No longer to remember,
nor struggle to forget,
all that which evades me and
all that I regret.

Consciousness, you mock me
and burden with the weight
of all those who despise me, 
disdain me, and berate.

My suffering’s eternal,
which nothing can dispel,
and others’ joys, infernal;
reminders of my hell.

But overwhelming sorrow
in dreams must fade away,
or die, oppressed by horrors
of nightmare’s evil play.

Yes…

There’s heaven to be found
in surcease of sensation,
below or above ground—
Nirvana in negation.

Then let me now be senseless,
and ever so remain.
The devil take your red pill,
let blue snuff out the pain.

13 comments:

  1. Aw, this is so sad. It reminds me a lot of depression...

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  2. A truly amazing poem, but I hope you're not really feeling that blue?! :(

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  3. Are you OK? Message me on Facebook!

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  4. I'm going through a rough time, and sleeplessness and exhaustion don't help. But I'm too stupid/stubborn/Catholic to give up just yet. The tide is high, etc., etc.

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  5. Nice poem Mina but sorry to hear you feel that way - hope you can get out of feeling blue soon, feel a big yellow

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  6. Hang in there, Mina. The poem was wonderfully written and powerful, but I hope you're feeling better soon.

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  7. @David, I was on the point of asking "A big yellow *what*?" when I noticed your clarification. For which I'm sure my readers thank you. :-)

    Thanks, Ava, and all of you. Riding the stormy seas within is more than a bit surreal. When I feel this bad, it's *really* bad, because then I feel like I'm close to losing control—and that's pretty fucking scary. I can't see me doing myself harm, just suffering endlessly, which is equally horrifying.

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  8. Beautiful, haunting verse. Reminds me of my depression. Hugs for whatever you are going through, my sister friend.

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  9. Mina, I haven't been doing much online lately so I'm sorry I didn't see this sooner. Sure hope that things start looking up soon. Kudos on the poem...just too bad that the inspiration was that you are feeling so low. *hugs*

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  10. Thank you, Darlings. Love is always welcome, no matter when it comes. ❤

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  11. Wonderfully haunting. Nice to see some blue when it's a green day.

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